Diamonds, Engagement Rings & Diamond Jewelry in popular culture

Some of us were crushed when Soundgarden split up.  The band had recently had a string of hits, a phenomenon that generally directly precedes the demise of all great bands, especially hardcore grunge bands.  In 1996, Metallica refused to play Lollapalooza unless Soundgarden also played.  This further validation of their popularity was the final death knell for one of the original great grunge acts, who split in 1997 after a tension-filled world tour.  Bandmates focused most of their anger on singer Chris Cornell, who brought his own Yoko into the picture after he put a wedding ring on the finger of Alice In Chains manager Susan Silver.  Some claim that members of Soundgarden asked Silver to take over managing duties.  Most call her “Yoko”, which is never a good thing.

BUT THE GREAT NEWS IS…

A Soundgarden reunion was announced by uber-hottie Cornell on New Year’s Day. 

No "One Tree Hill" Soundtrack Nonsense Here.

Genius Guitarist Kim Thayil, Bassist Ben Shepherd, and Drummer Matt Cameron have been playing together recently, have been interviewed together, and seemed to get on just fine.  There was only one thing missing from the equation that equals Soundgarden: the screaming vocals of one Chris Cornell.  And the boys didn’t seem too anxious to see him again, with Thayil even saying, “I’d imagine [a reunion] could [happen], it’s perfectly within the realm of possibilities—everyone’s still alive.  But I don’t see it happening”.  That was in early 2009.  The implication is that they didn’t feel the love for Cornell anymore.

I mean, he has changed.  He’s married again, has 2 new kids, and lives in Paris.  He recorded his last album with hip-hop producer Timbaland.  The good thing about “Scream” is that it did show us that Chris hasn’t lost his formerly-signature vocal ability.  The bad thing is…well, pretty much everything else.  It was like someone put him on a short leash.  Even the video for the single “Scream” makes it seem like he was dying to push further. 

Some of us still crave “Pushing Forward Back”, not ‘restrained vocals with a backbeat suitable for “One Tree Hill”’.  I mean, really.  We don’t want “Part of Me”.  We want “Big Dumb Sex”.

The band reunited onstage with Pearl Jam on October 6, 2009.  During the encore, Temple of the Dog reunited for “Hunger Strike”, and, like magic, all four members of Soundgarden were collaborating. 

After all, everyone has changed since 1997.  Everyone cut their hair, married, had kids.  Well, Kim Thayil still looks and acts exactly the same, continuing to rock out all over the Seattle area.  He’s the exception that makes the rule, the walking time machine.  But Ben Shepherd has a daughter and owns an upscale Seattle bar called “Hazelwood”.  Matt Cameron is happily married and has 2 kids of his own.  I mean, these guys are now in their 40s. 

On the re-vamped SoundgardenWorld.com, the video on the homepage is vintage Soundgarden, a live performance of “Get On The Snake”, showing four guys needing haircuts and showers, banging their collective heads.  They are bringing us back to the truly good days of Soundgarden, even before “Black Hole Sun” tore up the charts and marked the beginning of the end for a band that was best when only hardcore fans had any idea who they were.

There is a story that went with the release of “Superunknown”.  It was said that the song “Like Suicide” was written by Cornell after a bird flew into his window.  To end the severely-injured animal’s suffering, it is said that he hit it with a brick.

For Soundgarden’s fans, we have finally been hit with a similar brick, and our suffering will soon end.  Now we just have to see if we still own flannel.

Daniel Radcliffe Will Never Live “Equus” Down.

Ever since our beloved little Harry Potter blossomed into a handsome—though short—teenager, young ladies are seeing him a bit differently.  Gone is our shy, unassuming little man with the unfortunate bowl haircut.  In comes the guy who took it all off on Broadway, who revealed his little Harry in front of live audiences and got rounds of applause of standing O’s all around (so to speak). 

Once You Go Equus, You Never Go Back.

In the upcoming Harry Potter film, “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows”, Radcliffe will go au naturel with Hermione.  As a person who has read the entire series, cover-to-cover, and on their release dates, I don’t recall any of the characters appearing in the raw.  In the film version of “Goblet of Fire”, even when Harry was in the Prefect’s bathtub, he was carefully surrounded by bubbles and the scene was filmed in such a way that only Moaning Myrtle seemed to get a charge out of it.  And while the characters all began to emerge as attractive adults, with Hermione dating Durmstrang Tri-Wizard Champion Viktor Krum; with Harry falling for Cho Chang, who was, at the time, involved with Cedric Diggory (played by a pre-Twilight and well-shorn Robert Pattinson); and with Ron clearly in love with Hermione but unable to speak it. 

Our little Hogwarts kids were growing up.

While Daniel Radcliffe was taking his bare bows onstage, Emma Watson (Hermione) was posing in suggestive ad campaigns for high-end designers and even accepted an engagement ring from boyfriend Jay Barrymore, who was afraid she’s go off the University in America and meet some other guy.  Which she, evidently, did.  Enter drummer Rafael Cebrian of Spanish band The Monomes—don’t worry that you’ve never heard of them.  No one had, until Hermione Granger Emma Watson started dating their drummer.  The story is that they met at Brown and have been “hanging out”, although Watson’s fiancé was making plans as recently as late October to move to the States to be with her.  Rupert Grint, our flame-headed and painfully shy Ron Weasley, has managed to stay out of the tabloids by not dating.

But nothing was going to keep this story—ahem—undercover.  “Deathly Hallows” Director David Yates created scenes in which Harry could be in the buff again.  For some kind of magical creature to conjure a scene in which Harry and Hermione are kissing without clothes to bring out Ron’s jealousy is one thing, but to have him standing at King’s Cross Station stark naked just seems a little uncalled-for.  Granted, the Harry Potter series started collecting fans of all ages, and the kids who began reading “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” are now well into their teens and maybe wanting to see a little more magical skin.

If they missed “Equus”, they’ll get their chance to see new parts of Harry Potter.  Anyone who has seen a fashion magazine in the last two years has seen little Hermione turn into a bit of a sex kitten for the sake of fashion.  And, if you have an itch to see Ron Weasley without a shirt, the 2010 release of the film “Cherrybomb” will show a completely different, darker side of the actor (again, so to speak). 

Some of us don’t really want to think of Harry Potter as even HAVING naughty bits.  Alan Strang, his character from “Equus” can have the naughty bits.  But now that he’s opened the floodgates (yet again, so to speak), Daniel Radcliffe has also opened the door to having any director decide to write in naked scenes.

Harry, what would Lily and James say?  And where’s that Invisibility Cloak when you need it?

New York — Alex Rodriguez, the New York Yankees slugger, is once again playing spiritual musical chairs.  Girlfriend Kate Hudson, credited by the Yankees’ staff for A-Rod’s recently-stellar performance on the field, is exposing him to more than previously thought—he’s now experimenting with Buddhism.  A source reveals that, “it seems like Alex really just wants to make her happy.”

"Let's root, root, root for the Buddha!"

‘Happy’ includes house-hunting on both east and west coasts, since Kate is LA-based and A-Rod is New York-based.  With the two preparing to share a house, it can’t be long before we see Kate wearing a sparkly new engagement ring.  But that’s for the post-season.  For now, Hudson and her friends are content to drape prayer beads over the railing in front of her seat, picking them up to say whichever Buddhist prayer there is for making it to the World Series.

That Bodhidharma—he thought of EVERYTHING.

According to the New York Daily News, A-Rod has been “flirting with Buddhism”, since Kate has been a longtime follower of the practice.  His true devotion is a bit questionable, however.  When he was dating Madonna prior to her dumping him for an even younger hot Latino, he studied Kabbalah.  Now that she’s got a guy named Jesus turning into a Jew for her, the smitten third-baseman has decided that it is Buddha who will guide him.  If he starts dating porn star Asia Carrera, he won’t know whom to thank for his success.  She’s an atheist.

If Alex Rodriguez doesn’t settle down soon, he’s likely to go through every deity in the book.  Then to whom will he pray for monstrous home runs and bullet-like throws to first base?  Will all the gods turn on him?  Will he resort to acknowledging genetics, supplements, and good coaches?

Right now, all the credit for his recent success on the field has gone to his—ahem—active relationship with Kate Hudson.  She’s been filling him with self-confidence nightly, while he’s been filling her with Buddha-knows-what.

If the Yankees want to give brownie-points to Kate Hudson or Buddha for Alex’s athletic performance, that’s fine.

Just keep him away from Marilyn Manson.

And In Other News: The Sky Is Blue

Anaheim, California – New York Yankees Closer Mariano Rivera was caught in the middle of a controversy in which he was accused of…wait for it…spitting.  As natural to baseball players as crotch-grabbing and picking up women, spitting is just a part of the game.  Mariano Rivera is as likely to accumulate mucous as the next person, and, because he’s a ballplayer and spitting is what they do, he spat.

Is This The Face of A Spitballer?

But this is the ALCS.  Serious business.  Despite the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (with the worst name in all of baseball) actually winning the game, fans of LAA needed to make a fuss over something, and it was the salivary glands of a Yankees pitcher that they chose to focus on.  Perhaps tiring over blaming the deep pockets of the Yankees ownership and their consequent ability to sign an almost-all-marquee staff, the subject of Monday night’s game would be phlegm.

Um, get a life, folks.

Going into the controversial playoff game, the Yankees led the series 2-0.  Game three proved itself to be an 11-inning nail-biter, but the Angels emerged victorious.  The Yankees now only had a 2-1 series lead, and the underdogs felt—possibly for the first time—like they had a shot.  And then some idiot with a YouTube account decided to make things more interesting.

An unbelievable amount of other YouTube videos showing slow-motion versions of Rivera’s alleged spit-ball, versions including commentary by fans, the actual FOX footage from the game, and so on.

The “damning evidence” shows Rivera looking intently at the ball, then looking towards the plate, then spitting.  He then rubbed the ball before throwing his pitch.

Let’s review.  A pitcher looked at the baseball he was about to throw it.  Then the same pitcher looked towards the target at which he would be throwing the aforementioned baseball.  Preferring to pitch without fluid in his mouth—or, perhaps, because it might be a superstitious thing he does before each pitch—the player then discharges any saliva.  As he prepares to throw the ball, he rubs it.  Maybe he wants to make sure he has a good grip.  Such things are important when you’re a fireball-throwing legendary closing pitcher.

Then some clown with a camera-phone and too much free time claims that the pitcher was spitting on the ball, which, in case you didn’t aren’t aware, is a big no-no in baseball.

Mariano Rivera is one of the most feared and respected closers in the game.  He doesn’t need to spit on a ball.  If he weren’t among the best, he wouldn’t be playing for a team that can buy any player they want.  He is now in year 2 of a 3-year, $45 million dollar contract that made him the highest-paid closer in the game when he signed.  During the 2008 season, he was chosen to announce the winner of a promotion that offered a diamond engagement ring and proposal in front of 50,000 fans at Yankee Stadium.  He also gave the winner tips on married life, as the devout Christian pitcher has been happily with his wife since 1991.  That’s like 100 years of marriage in Baseball World, where wives come and go like the tides.  He is even the judge in the Yankees’ Clubhouse Kangaroo Court, in which players are fined for various offenses that anyone not on the team can’t—and probably doesn’t want to—know about.

This is not a man who cheats.  He doesn’t have to.

After reviewing tapes of the supposed ‘event’, the Office of the Commissioner of Major League Baseball cleared Rivera of any wrong-doing.  Even Angels’ Manager Mike Scioscia said, “There are certainly some guys that might be suspect.  Never Mariano…I’d be shocked if there was anything to that.”

Dude didn’t even get upset when he found out that conspiracy theorists were after him  “Why would I get mad?” Rivera said. “I mean, I care about what the fans think about me, but if somebody has followed my career for years, that’s a lot of spit.”

Everyone who is not a Yankees fan must accept a few truths: A. They can afford to buy the best in the game, and they do, every single year.  B. Money can go a long way towards buying a championship—but not always.  C. Even if you can’t stand the Yankees, even if you want to burn Steinbrenner in effigy every day of the year, there are some actually good men—not just good players—on the team.  (When did we stop mocking A-Rod for dating Madonna, anyway?)

Crying foul every time a ballplayer shoots some phlegm onto the field is like getting mad at a teenaged boy for stealing his mother’s Victoria’s Secret catalog.

Either way, a man’s gotta get his fluids out.

What better way to promote a new movie than by getting divorced, or—better still—letting out rumors of divorce?  Rumors of marriage, fake marriage, infidelity and impending divorce are all fantastic ways to create buzz about an upcoming film/CD/television show.  Easy to ignore?  Maybe.  But, on the other hand, sometimes not.

Jennifer Lopez went to the premiere of “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” with neither wedding ring nor undernourished husband.  Did this mean there was trouble in the Lopez/Anthony household?  Were twins Max and Emme about to become just the next children of a broken home (or several broken mansions, as the case may be)?  When a woman goes out without her 8-carat diamond wedding ring, sometimes rumors start.  When that person is an oft-married celebrity, rumors FLY.

Marriage Troubles, Or A New Movie Coming Out?

Clearly, with a new movie coming out, she needed a shot of press attention, STAT.  The upcoming movie, “Plan B”, is about a single woman who uses artificial insemination to conceive and then finds romance.  Didn’t I see an episode of “Will & Grace” like that?  Anyway, it’s a movie coming out in 2009, and no one heard of it until the clever ‘divorcing Marc Anthony and going to her own Plan B’ rumors started swirling around.

A few nights after the wedding ring-less movie premiere, J. Lo and Marc Anthony went out to dinner, together, wearing their wedding rings, and evidently looking all googly-eyed at each other.  Hopefully, Marc had a large meal, as he has spent his entire career looking sickly and vile, especially next to Jennifer Lopez and her notorious caboose. 

It is difficult to speculate as to the strength of the J. Lo/Marc Anthony union.  Jennifer has been married quite often, after all, and you never know when it’s time to trade up.  Marc Anthony, who was little more than “who?” before marrying his megastar wife, might not be enjoying his role as Mr. Lopez.  Even starring in a movie together–one that no one saw–didn’t elevate his status. Who knows?  One thing is certain, however: they are both media-savvy enough to know that nothing garners attention so much as rumors of divorce.  Thank God for that, or “Plan B” might be released, totally unnoticed.  Tragic.

Kim Kardashian, one of our favorite people who is famous for being famous, has used the tremendous international credibility she earned on her reality television show “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” to score a job with the UN. Prior to her success on the small screen, she was recognizable only because of her last name. Her father, Robert Kardashian, was one of O.J. Simpson’s “dream team” of lawyers in his 1994 murder trial. By being wealthy, in Los Angeles, and having a J. Lo-style impressive rear-end, she was able to score a reality tv deal that has made her famous all over the world. A regular draw in the tabloids for her frequent naked magazine pictorials and a stolen sex tape released at just the right moment (thanks for the idea, Paris Hilton!), Kim was the only natural choice for UN Ambassador to South Africa. She is teaming up with Russell Simmons Diamond Empowerment Fund, which raises money for disadvantaged people in African nations in which diamonds are a natural resource.

UN Goodwill Ambassador, In Clothes

In one of the more touching and memorable episodes of “Keeping Up With The Kardashians”, the whole family—including Mother Kris and Stepfather Bruce Jenner (who appears to be the only one with sense in the family)—is touched by their experience in meeting a homeless man whom they had unceremoniously asked to leave the vicinity of their upscale clothing boutique. The younger sisters, Khloe and Kourtney (not kidding), feeling guilty, decide to bring the man home so he can shower and loofah in their mother’s shower, and then dress up in Bruce Jenner’s clothes. They also decide to pay for his to have his few teeth looked at by a dentist. When they realize—silly girls—that they have a photo shoot and can’t bring him to the dentist, they coerce Bruce into doing it, despite his recognition that his stepdaughters are complete idiots. In the end, they dump him off at a shelter, because everyone, especially the Kardashians, know that all problems are solved within the 30-minute time span of a television show.

So you can see why Kim is a perfect choice in a diplomatic position for the government. On December 1, 2008, Kim attended the Empowerment of Africa dinner in New York, an event planned by media mogul Russell Simmons to raise money for his Diamond Empowerment Fund. The organization supports education initiatives to empower the economically disadvantaged people in African nations that rely on diamond mining for international trade. Kim Kardashian did not accept the position merely to give her easier access to diamonds. She has been a long-time admirer of Angelina Jolie’s position as UN Goodwill Ambassador since 2001, and, since Kim has recently announced that she will no longer be posing nude, she has some extra time on her hands. The UN offered her the position because they are “looking for more influential ‘pop culture’ celebs to inspire younger generations to become more involved in international affairs” (Bossip.com). Kim herself has been inspired to help others before. After touring the Lower Ninth Ward of New Orleans and meeting a family of 4 living in a FEMA trailer for 3 years, the Kardashian girls all decided that they would take the family to buy all new furniture—for a house they don’t have. I guess it’s the thought that counts. That mother and her children will be the envy of everyone else in the endless rows of FEMA trailers when they are sitting outside in their brand-spanking-new recliners!

While in New Orleans, Kim and her sisters visited with Kim’s longtime boyfriend Reggie Bush of the New Orleans Saints. For months, there have been rumors about Kim getting an engagement ring from her Running Back honey, but, since Kim was already once married from 2000-2004, she is not hurrying down the aisle this time. Or so she says. Anyway, she has plenty to do, what with the tv show, the boutique, her website, posing nearly-naked, and shopping for clothes that, evidently, cut off circulation to her head. Oh yeah, and that UN thing.