Diamonds, Engagement Rings & Diamond Jewelry in popular culture

Soon enough, you can cyber-kiss any of the Papal rings, from the early renaissance ruby and diamond rings to the current solid gold ring worn by Pope Benedict XVI.  No longer do you have to wait in huge crowds to merely see His Holiness go by in his pimped-out Mercedes-Benz SUV Popemobile; or travel all the way to Vatican City to be a speck in a crowd in St. Peter’s square; or try to score tickets to any of the masses over which he presides and grants “audiences”.  Expecting to be given a direct blessing by the Pope is like expecting that Ed McMahon was going to show up at your door with a check for millions of dollars (y,know, before he died).  It could happen, but it wasn’t likely.  But now, all of that isn’t necessary.  All of the legwork is being taken out of chasing the Holy Father around the globe.  All you need now is an internet connection and a working knowledge of social media.

Who wouldn't want this guy as a Facebook friend?

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the Papacy is getting its own Facebook page.  It already has an event page that was designed to promote Benedict XVI’s September trip to the UK.  Apparently, despite the six-month expiration of the event for which it was designed, more than 10,000 people regularly check in.  Those devout Catholics evidently need to get their mass on.  Seeing this, the Vatican’s social communications office found an untapped market: Facebook freaks.  The millions and millions of people across the globe who spend hours every day—hours when they should be focusing on spreadsheets for work or maintaining relationships with family—screwing around on Facebook.  And out of those millions and millions, there are scads of Catholics.  That’s just math.  The launch of the new Vatican website will, initially, be dedicated to upcoming beatification of Pope John Paul II on May 1.  It will link to video highlights of His (late) Holiness’s 27-year papacy.  The designers of the page are focusing entirely on the beatification for now.

But the Holy See is hoping for much more from this re-entry into social media.  The six-month old, never-updated page has become an online community in which Catholics, or any interested person, can interact.  At Easter, the Vatican is launching an information web portal, the contents of which are meant to be posted, tweeted, and even blogged.  It will contain information about the Vatican’s views on, for example, the Tsunami in Japan or the various uprisings in the Middle East.  With a multi-media format, “friends” of the Popedom can send out the Vatican’s innermost feelings about issues with the click of a mouse.  Pope Benedict XVI did the unthinkable when he allowed “the faithful” to ask questions online.  While an exhaustive search of the Vatican website, various websites for “the faithful”, and a Google search provided no “Contact the Pontiff” links, it is possible that they were already taken down.  When His Holiness responds to some of these questions on Good Friday, he will be the first Pope ever to answer to online posts.  His pre-recorded responses will be available on Italian state television, and, 10 seconds later, on YouTube.  No word yet on whether there are plans for a Pontifex Maximus YouTube channel.

The original Vatican website will remain as it is, posting the Pope’s schedule, Papal events, celebrations, and links to get tickets.  That will stay as it has always been.  But now you can “like” and “friend” the Vatican and Pope Benedict XVI, all without getting out of your PJs and slippers.  With friends like that…

The Pope is going out on the road again, and has scheduled to preside over masses in various parts of the UK, including Birmingham, London, and Glasgow.  Entrance to the mass is free, of course, but a £5- 25 “donation” is recommended, and admittance will not be given without the suggested monetary contribution.  Despite the relatively small offering to cover costs of travel and accommodations, it seems that the Pope is simply not selling out the way he used to.  Spokespeople for the Vatican have said that “administrative problems” have been the cause of lowered expected attendance, but others have suggested that it is the scandals that have plagued the Church that are creating the less-than-stellar response.  Perhaps if His Holiness added a little extra bling to his already-giant gold cross, adding a chain of diamonds or an iced-out watch to complement the traditional Papal ring, he could draw a more enthusiastic, younger crowd.

Bringing His Holiness into Popular Culture.

Short of that, when Pope Benedict XVI announced his plans to tour, a musical group called Ooberfuse recorded a track in his honor.  The British band wrote the song “Heart’s Cry” in his honor, sampling from a few of his speeches and stating, “No rest ‘till all creation knows Thy sway”.  While their motivation seems to come from a place of faith, they have also created a music video to promote the single, which is available now on iTunes for a mere £1.99.  The peace-promoting video includes footage of His Holiness saying that, “Hatred will never reign in the hearts of men again”.   Who knows where hatred reigns in the hearts of women, once might ask.  Nonetheless, Bishops of the Organising Committee have designated the song as the official “youth anthem of the Papal visit”.  Hal, one of the three members of Ooberfuse, has told the press that, “I think this is the first time in history a reigning Pontiff has embraced the forms of popular culture to advance the Christian message of love and hope”.

This is almost true, although in February of this year the Vatican newspaper released a list of the Holy See’s Top 10 Rock and Pop Albums of all time.  Making the cut at that time were The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Oasis, U2, and Michael Jackson, among others.  It seems, in light of certain heavily-spotlighted events, that the Pontifex Maximus would have wanted to distance himself and his church as far away from Michael Jackson as possible, but, evidently, the papacy has a soft spot for rocking out to songs from the “Thriller” LP.

This trip to the UK will feature an all-new, high-tech Popemobile for His Holiness to ride around in during his visit.  The modified Mercedes-Benz M-Class “green petrol” SUV has been built with a special, bulletproof enclosure into which the Pontiff can be raised while touring.  Should the Father Confessor decide he wants to see what this latest Popemobile can do, he will find that it is designed to reach up to 160mph.  That baby is as suited for the Autobahn as it is to cruise at an expected 10mph as the Pope travels to his appearances.  One can hope that the tepid response to his visit is due to the aforementioned administrative problems, or, perhaps, the down economy.  Maybe the hip hop single and pimped-out ride can help to offset what is looking to be a disappointing trip.

If not, the “youth anthem” is still climbing the charts, and, clearly, someone up there is watching out for the kids of Ooberfuse, who are making some serious bank while they spread their message.