Levi Johnston: Aspiring Mayor, TV Star, Spreader of Seed
It’s a name we could have gone a lifetime without knowing. Levi Johnston could easily be just some Alaskan redneck with a mullet drinking PBR tallboys with the guys and discussing his latest conquests. No such luck. Because of those powerful, icy swimmers of his, he became better known—and more respected—than the woman who forced him to put an engagement ring on her pregnant daughter’s finger. While his 15 minutes were supposed to be over after his spread in Playgirl, he has managed to stretch it out more than two fat kids wrestling over a Snickers. Not only does he still intend to run for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, but he intends to do so in his very own reality TV show.
Helloooooooo, Mr. Mayor!
He’s no longer planning to marry Bristol Palin, as we all know. Their second engagement was cut off when news broke that he may have impregnated another young Wasilla girl. Bristol was also apparently miffed when he co-starred in a music video lampooning the famous family he was once to be a part of. Whatever. He and the people who clearly think for him realized that he is one of Alaska’s untapped resources: pliable stupidity. He’ll do anything that his agents tell him to. And there’s no shame in being ridiculed for everything he does. He still gets chicks, and has shown that he can procreate with the best of ‘em.
His talents are to next be showcased in a show called Loving Levi: The Road to The Mayor’s Office. While the double-entendre no doubt went over his head, it is just clever enough to get people to watch, provided that the as-yet unscripted show is picked up by a network. The 20 year-old’s manager, Tank Jones (not kidding), has confirmed the reports that Levi is serious about running for office because he sees that there are serious political issues that need to be addressed in his hometown. He goes on to reassure us that, “This is not a spoof. This is not a joke.”
The truth is, Levi hardly finds himself with a tough act to follow. How much worse can he possibly be than his babymomma’s momma?
Levi has made sure to be seen over the last few weeks. He appeared at the Teen Choice Awards Sunday on the arm of Brittani Senser, the singer who hired him to appear in her music video. He was at the same awards show last year, but escorted Kathy Griffin. It was perfect exposure for a young man who hopes to lead a small town into the big time. Tank Jones has said that Levi was very serious about his mayoral bid, with or without television cameras following his every move. Whatever.
Either way, it seems that, at this time, Levi Johnston has a more promising political future than Sarah Palin. Somewhere in Alaska right now, a woman is loading her shotgun and preparing to shoot some defenseless animals.