“Seducing Cindy” Makes “Flavor of Love” Seem Dignified
In 1993, Cindy Margolis was named by the Guinness Book of World Records as the Most Downloaded Woman on the Internet. This was not because of her insightful commentary on world events or because of her rapier-like wit. It’s because she looked good naked. Or nearly naked. And now, at age 44, after one divorce, three children, and a spread in Playboy, she finds herself single for the first time in her life, and still looking good without clothes on. So she did what any normal former-Playmate-now-nearly-unrecognizable-because-of-cosmetic-surgery would do: create a reality show. The contestants were chosen from the biggest fans of her website. That was sure to bring in the winners.
This Classy Chick Is Looking For A New Life Mate. Or Something.
And boy, did it. Ranging in age from 18 to 71, men from all over the world (okay, all Americans except for one Brit and one Mexican) responded to her web request and 24 lucky guys showed up, ready to compete. Rather than just having the boys move into the house, Margolis planned her “dream wedding” and set it up so each man would walk down the aisle to her as she waited on the altar. Such a Cinderella story. A woman made famous on the internet for showing her goodies stood outside on a beautiful day, wearing a beautiful dress, surrounded by guests, waiting for the 24 men of her dreams to show up. Forgoing the tradition of receiving engagement rings from any of them as they arrived, she greeted them warmly, no matter what they looked like.
And they are quite a bunch. 19-year-old Jonathan Brown was proud to announce that he experienced his first, ahem, reaction to a picture of Cindywhen he was just 9. He says that his dream would be to take her to Comic-Con. 71-year-old John, a British gentleman, likened his introduction to Margolis to “meeting the Queen of England”, and then went on the say, in his charming English accent, that the most attractive part of Cindy is…something they can’t show on Fox Reality Network. Also included in her slew of suitors is a professional wrestler who rips his shirt off when he meets her at the altar, after which she says, “At my dream wedding, all the men rip their shirts off”. Classy. There is Chris, a musician with more piercings than brain cells and an inexplicable long, jet-black beard; a Tupac Shakur impersonator; an idiot longshoreman known as Timmy Z; a salmon fisherman from Alaska; a Playgirl model; and some random 18-year-old kid, among others.
As night falls, Cindy stands in front of her wedding cake and refers to this time being her ‘wedding reception’. The creepiness factor only increases as she slices a piece from the cake and announces that the man to whom she gives the cake will be invited to spend some private time with her in the “Love Shack”. Last night’s winner was a 23-year-old college wrestler who had presented Cindy with a t-shirt from his alma mater for her oldest son. That touched her heart, apparently, so she invited him for some quality time away from the 23 other guys. Actually, it was only 22 other guys, since 71-year-old John had already bailed, saying that he was too old to deal with the “teenage garbage” that was going on at the house already.
Anyway, Margolis, who had previously said, “You can’t kiss anyone on TV” ended up with her tongue down the throat of her young escort, and all within telescope range of the tequila-shooting contestants in the house above. Clips from later episodes reveal that she doesn’t limit herself to making out with just that one admirer.
Her first challenge for the men on the show was to submit a sperm sample, so she could learn who is most potent. And the 18 remaining contestants all stepped up to the plate, so to speak. It is not surprising to learn that she got reality TV dating advice from Bret Michaels of Rock of Love, Rock of Love II, and Rock of Love: Tour Bus. Cindy does say that she falls in love, but adds that she did so with more than one man. At the end of the series, it will be interesting to see if any of the contestants really want to marry this woman forever, or if they just want to test-drive a famous naked chick.
Good luck with that, Cindy.