Since the US gets all of its television ideas from England, particularly its reality shows, it only makes sense that we would, one day, get our own Susan Boyle.  When Kevin Skinner walked out onto the stage June 30 in old jeans, work boots, a ratty Baja pullover, and a baseball cap on backwards, everyone figured he would make a fool of himself.  Of course, he did, briefly, when asked by judge David Hasselhoff what he does for work, and he admitted that he was unemployed, but used to be a chicken-catcher.  His thick Kentucky accent had everyone thinking “talentless redneck”, but there was a hint of “or is he?” 

"I May Not Look Purdy But At Least I Got On My Original Face."

"I May Not Look Purdy But At Least I Got On My Original Face."

But just a hint, and a tiny one at that.

Mostly, we were thinking that he was a catastrophe waiting to happen, live, in front of the entire country (or whatever portion of it watches “America’s Got Talent”, anyway).  A 35-year old out-of-work chicken-wrangler who talks slower than cold molasses on a winter night.  Surely, it was to be an All-American version of William Hung, right?  The female judge, who is apparently British, was actually cackling away.  He was judged and on his way back to the farm in her eyes.

And then he started plucking on his guitar and singing.  Even those of us who don’t listen to country music were thinking “wow”.  The camera even panned to David Hasselhoff visibly saying, “Wow”. 

And then we’re all of a sudden thinking of what Kevin Skinner could look like after a good hot shower, wearing new jeans and a button-down shirt, and, probably, a cowboy hat.  Suddenly, he was not so ridiculous.  Even the cackling Brit quieted down.

And then we squinted.  Is that Sharon Osbourne?  My God, what happened to her face?  She doesn’t even look like herself.  It sounds like her, and it dresses like her, right down to the flashy diamond earrings.  Mostly it sounds like her.  There are no other human vocal cords that can make that kind of noise.  But it really doesn’t look like her.  It’s definitely a woman, and not a bad-looking woman for her age, but that face is not the face of Sharon Osbourne.  At least she was able to get over herself and realize that that Kentucky boy could sing. 

Kevin Skinner’s Got Talent, and Sharon Osbourne’s got, evidently, an entirely new head.

Mazal tov to both of them.

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