Sometimes, Love Is Just Plain Icky.
Attractive, normal couples are so dull. Hollywood is full of beautiful people pairing up for a while, being endlessly photographed, and then breaking up in front of the whole world before they each move on to their next beautiful person (or record/movie producer). When a beautiful person and a hideous person pair up, that’s a little more interesting. The former pairing of Marilyn Manson and Rose McGowan was utterly compelling and completely outside our realm of understanding. But when two train wrecks find each other, well, it just puts that warm fuzzy feeling in our hearts and gives us plenty of material to laugh at (this means you, Amy Winehouse and Blake What’s-His-Name).
If A 10-Car Pile-Up Could Smile...
Mickey Rourke, who used to be really hot when he was in “9 ½ Weeks” and “Angel Heart” in the 80s, fell completely off our radar until he resurfaced with his BAFTA-winning, Oscar-nominated performance in the movie “The Wrestler”. When we saw him again, his face was mangled. It was not mangled because of anything that happened during filming. It is highly probably that Rourke’s plastic surgeon has some kind of personal vendetta against him, or perhaps it is Rourke himself who requested the same doctor that is slowly transforming that strange woman into a cat, one disastrous cosmetic procedure at a time.
Courtney Love, who was always a sight to see, would periodically appear at events looking shockingly normal and beautiful, but would soon return to her rocker/skank look. She has clearly had some work done, although her face is more reminiscent of an actual human, despite her pathological need to have huge lips.
Evidently, during the Golden Globes a few weeks ago, Rourke texted Love out of the blue and asked her on a date. Evidently, they met in secret and, according to sources, “Let’s just say they didn’t stop at holding hands and a chaste peck on the cheek”. There’s a shock, what with the two of them looking so chaste and all. The UK’s “Daily Mirror” reports that “Courtney has quite a crush on Mickey and finds him utterly compelling.”
Rourke’s face is compelling, in that sort of ‘can’t look away from a multi-car pile-up’ way. But he must have one heckuva sense of humor and be a really, really nice guy. As for Courtney, well, her personality disorders are well known, so she must be compelling in some way most of us don’t understand. Her music is good, when she’s recording. That can go a long way.
But what if this relationship lasts? It seems like it actually can, given the two people involved and how well-matched they are. Will Courtney soon be sporting a skull-and-crossbones diamond engagement ring? Will they breed? Given their love of cosmetic procedures and injectables (don’t get excited, Courtney, we’re not talking about heroin, so quit drooling), will their offspring come out normal, or will Courtney give birth to a Cabbage Patch Doll?
It’s good for them that they found each other, cuz there ain’t exactly a line behind either one at this point. As long as you don’t count the flies.