Miami Heat guard Dwayne Wade has found something to give his estranged wife that lasts even longer than diamonds: an STD. According to legal papers filed by Siohvaughn Wade, Dwayne’s wife of six years, her husband gave her an ‘unspecified’ sexually transmitted disease during their marriage, and she is demanding a list of all of his sexual partners during that time.
D-Wade: Keeping His Balls In The Air.
The couple, who were high school sweethearts, exchanged wedding rings in 2002. Despite the obvious marital issues affecting Siohvaughn, it was Dwayne who petitioned for divorce last May in Cook County, Illinois. They have two children: Zaire, age 7, and Zion, age 1. Mother and children recently moved back to their native Chicago.
D-Wade has an annual salary from the Miami Heat of $14,410,581, and also rakes in millions from endorsements for Gatorade, Sidekick, and Converse. He has not been shy about spending or sharing the wealth, buying about a dozen or so cars for himself; paying for a $2 million church for his mother; giving family and friends access to accounts that held shared marital assets; and, allegedly, placing large sums of money into a shared account with another woman. Clearly, Siohvaughn married an idiot, but that doesn’t mean she deserves a sexually transmitted disease that may or may not recur.
Among his other failures as his “Father of the Year 2007”, D-Wade has, according to court papers, abandoned his children. His wife claims that 1 year-old Zion doesn’t even recognize him because he never spends any time with them. When he does, she claims that the children are often afraid of him. She wants sole custody, and, one can imagine, some rather hefty support.
The mystery STD, which is, evidently, not one of the Big Ones, was diagnosed in the fall of 2007. Why she stayed with him this long is a mystery. She is demanding a list of all his ‘paramours’ during their marriage. We hope that “Girl in Detroit” and “That Chick With The Guns” will be sufficient information for any legal proceedings. One of the non-mystery women has been actress Gabrielle Union, who was once married to former Jacksonville Jaguar Chris Howard. What IS it about those uniforms? Hopefully, Gabrielle had the sense to have D-Wade fully laminated before any contact took place.
D-Wade’s attorneys, in the grand tradition of divorce attorneys, claim that all of the allegations against D-Wade are false. The response from Siohvaughn’s attorney; “Medical records don’t lie”. That woman must be some kind of ticked off to admit to the entire planet that she contracted an STD from her wayward, professional athlete husband. Of course, she should have seen that train barreling down the tracks the minute he signed his multi-million-dollar deal. Or the second he was given a catchy nickname. That’s usually the end of the road for wife #1.
Our best wishes to Siohvaughn. Perhaps, instead, she would prefer a lifetime supply of Zovirax?
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