Over the weekend of December 20, actress and singer Zooey Deschanel got engaged to Emo god Ben Gibbard of the band “Death Cab for Cutie”.  The shamelessly adorable couple has been dating for over a year, despite the misguided rumors of her engagement to another Emo musician, AFI bassist Hunter Burgan.  Although there is no word yet about engagement rings, and pictures of Zooey wearing one have not been splashed all over the tabloids yet, it is only a matter of time.  When Emos mate, they tend to do so in a much more understated way.   It’s like watching the Discovery Channel, only with a more emotional soundtrack.  And anyone filming must be quiet, so as not to spook the camera-shy tender-hearts, who often hide behind long dyed-black bangs and thick black glasses.

Zooey Deschanel: Cute As A Roomful of Kittens, and Engaged!

Zooey Deschanel: Cute As A Roomful of Kittens, and Engaged!

Zooey Deschanel first popped into the public eye in Kate Hudson’s breakout film, “Almost Famous”, in which she played the older sister and giver-of-musical-taste to younger brother William, the hero of the movie.  Although her role was a supporting one, she made a huge impression on Jollywood.  She has flown mostly under the radar, accepting smaller—but more interesting—roles in both large and small budget films.  She has also lent her voice to characters on “The Simpsons” and “American Dad”, earning her street cred with people who don’t want to like anything that is too mainstream.

Nonetheless, she joined the establishment with her role as Allison in the Jim Carrey blockbuster “Yes Man”.  Since Jim Carrey is incapable of doing anything on a small scale, Zooey found herself in the middle of a huge freakin’ deal.  Great for the wallet, certainly, but not when your fan base is largely people who sit in their basements contemplating the futility of life and burning themselves with lighters ‘just so they can feel something’.
Fortunately for our Zooey, who is as adorable as a room full of kittens, she is in an obscure-but-beloved band called “She & Him”.  And all doubts about her were certainly cast aside when she became engaged to Ben Gibbard, singer of not one, but TWO Emo bands, “Death Cab for Cutie” and “The Postal Service”.  I’m sure there are tears being wept in basements and dark rooms all over the world as greasy-haired boys listen over and over to the Emo anthem “Transatlantacism”.

The couple is ecstatic over their engagement, and Zooey feels as though she’s been ‘swept off her feet’.  They have not yet announced a wedding date, but we can be certain that the affair will be tasteful, that the wedding rings will be understated, and that the music at the reception will be awesome.

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